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She Thinks My Sentimental Side Should Be Held With Kids Gloves...

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5th August 2007

10:07am: I am jubilant at my own good fortune. Most of you have read the other two accounts of what I shall henseforth refer to as our Triumvirate of Awesome, and that leaves me to blather on for a few hundred paragraphs, gesticulating wildly and carrying on in the most heinous fashion possible. Herein lies the tale of the legendary and utterly infamous Milwaukeexplosion, and my god have mercy upon your sanity.

14th November 2005

10:27pm: "It's Been Fine For A While, But It's Time To Say 'Bye'..."
In light of recent events:

Image hosted by Photobucket.com


Comment to be added. I don't want any stalker bullshit and I'll be doing my best to ensure that none of it ever happens again. If you have any qualms with this, kindly fuck right off.

Thank you.


This is NOT a Friend's Cut, merely a lockdown of all previous entries and those yet to come. If you've already been added you needn't reinsert yourself begging for my forgiveness, I assure you that I still adore you and I'm not planning to axe murder your families while they sleep.

On the other hand, should anyone new wish to add me, I'd be most obliged if they themselves commented to ask permission. Thank you.
Current Mood: completely pissed

29th December 2004

11:52pm: "Such a Strange Numb, And it Brings my Knees to the Earth..."
Went on a "fun-filled" family outing today witht the Woman and the Sibling, which actually didn't turn out quite as badly as anticipated. Ponced off to the California Science Center and saw the Body Worlds exhibition, which was insanely cool. Slightly unnerving, completely awesome. To anyone in Southern California within any vicinity of Los Angeles, I'd highly recommend it, as it's only here until the 23rd. And come on, it's tons and tons of fucking dead people. They even have a few dead fetus'. And a duck made entirely of it's own blood vessles.


After that it was scampering off to the Biltmore for something to eat and then an obscenely long-winded (and highly retarded) drive around L.A. (not that I've ever BEEN THERE BEFORE or anything, fucking a) and then around the Hollywood Hills (ditto) listening to the woman talking ferverently about the escapist wonders of L.A. County and how fabulous it would be to live there. Despite the fact that the rent is insane. And that even stepping onto the L.A. county borders increases one's car insurance some $200.

Go go logical thought. Seriously.

Oh well, at least the dehydrated ice cream, flayed human muscle tissue and potatoe dumplings made it worth the while. Sort of.

And Jerry Orbach died today, which is a fairly depressing thing indeed, seeing as Law and Order has been one of my favorite shows over the past four years or so. Lovely morning wake-up call. I'm actually a bit sad about it.

Staying awake any longer to type more of entry < sleep.
Current Mood: worn-out

28th December 2004

1:30pm: "Tell Me what You Want Me To Be..."
Go and see this movie. Now.

It's so worth it.

In other news, fuck all of this. Seriously, today has been so utterly full of shit I can't stand it. Maybe my boss will call me and ask me to work today. Something that will validate this all as being time that isn't completely wasted.

Well, we can only hope. I think I'm going to find something to glare at purposfully until the woman gets the fuck up off of ehr lazy, pre-menopausal, middle-aged, lame ass and takes me down town. Not that I'm not already over a half an hour late as it is. And not that there were huge misscomunication errors or anything of that sort.

I think I'd better stop typing before I write something I'll regret later on.
Current Mood: infuriated

27th December 2004

7:56pm: "And We Sing The Music Of the Night..."
Gacked from the one and only M-chan.

001. Reply with your name and I will write something about you.
002. I will then tell what you song[s] remind me of you.
003. Next, I will tell you who you remind me of, celebrity/animated or otherwise.
004. Last, I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
005. Put this in your journal.

I'm going to see Andrew Lloyd Weber's The Phantom of the Opera tonight with Adam. Am quite pleased with this knowledge, as it looks to be a very lovely film indeed and the main female actress is reputed to have a particularly beautiful voice (or at least one can assume this, as she sung at the Metropolitan Opera at age 9 for chrissakes).

Phwee. XD

I love working with Blake, he is the coolest manager evar (followed by Jessica, who also pwnz). Vincient Price nerds make me happy inside.
Current Mood: delightfully full
11:13am: Random Updates and Such.

No, this isn't about the huge tidal wave in Sri Lanka killing hundreds of thousands, it's to those I was supposed to give a phonecall to this weekend (i.e. Travis, Marisa, etc.). The woman, being the wonderfully pre-alzhimeric person she is, conviniently forgot to pay the phone bill. Again. And thus it was turned off at some extremely random hour yesterday afternoon and I was unable to give anyone a Holiday call.

Christmas went off without a hitch, mainly low-key and with a suprisingly minimal amount of idiocy, well, aside from Christmas Eve. That I won't talk about. I was bequeathed with lots of spiffy stuff, though the $50 gift card to my own store was a bit silly. I suppose my aunt and uncle never received the memo that I've been working there since AUGUST. I did get loads of stuff with it though, as my employee discount pwnz and the LOTR and HP stuff we have is fairly decent. I got a new bra, and a new bra size... er... yeah...

Finally received the LOTR:TT soundtrack (which means that, Ms. Trace, I'll be bringing you all the LOTR soundtracks when we go back to school), which makes me severely giddy, as Howard Shore is a god of some sort. Also have received MacFarlane toy of Jack the Ripper. Am not quite sure what to do with this at all. It frightens me somewhat.

My mother took a portrait of me all the way back from my junior prom, to send to my relatives for Christmas. When my Grandmother received it she actually broke into tears. Am still not sure if this is doe to the fact that I've aged so since I last saw my Grandfather and her or becuase I bear a rather starteling resemblance to their dead son. Still, am somewhat uncomfortable with the knowledge that I've inadvertantly caused an old woman to cry.

And, to close this, Interpol owns me.
Current Mood: newly awoken

24th December 2004

3:57pm: "O Tannenbaum, O Tannenbaum, Du Kannst Mir Sehr Gefallen!"
I just got off an eight hour shift that started at 6am this morning. I only got three and a half hours of sleep. My legs ache and my hands are filthy from cashiering all day.

And yet I feel strangely contented. And "sweet".

Tee hee. Hee.

My goodness, I cannot wait to see my pay check. I'm seriously tingling with the anticipation, among other things. Like a fading caffine/sugar buzz. And stuff.

And now, children, my holiday well-wishes to you all;


Have a Merry Christmas and the like. And, as I've holes in my aching fingers from the countless saftey tags that've pierced my skin, perhaps I'll wish you a Happy New Year as well.



Feliz Navidad bitches.
Current Mood: exhausted and content

19th December 2004

6:29am: "You Promised Me You'd Be Here By My Side, Warming My Heart On This Cold Winter's Night...."
All right, I concede. Seriously kids, oh my fucking god. Best person EVAR, I swear it.

Guess who just got the Lord of the Rings The Return of the King Special Edition Limited Edition Gift Box for Christmas, hm? XD

Adam pwnz. OMFG. Am going to go totally and utterly mad. It's so shiney! And, and it's got an extra DVD of Howard Shore making the symphonies for all the movies, and oh wow, am dying. This is quite possibly the most wonderful early Christmas gift I've ever received. I've promised I won't watch it until we can both sit down and view it together, but... maybe taking a peek at the "Making Of" DVD's won't hurt too much... XD

Now to justify the fact that I'm up at 6:30 in the morning when school's out until 2005... fucking work. Ugh. Kick me in the fucknig face. I even had a dream I over-slept and missed work, how utterly fucknig pathetic is that? Laaaaaaaaaaaame.

On an entirely different note, I only have some $53 left in which to use to complete my Christmas shopping. I have three people I still have yet to buy gifts for. I am completely screwed. And left feeling very inadaquate indeed.
Current Mood: utterly giddy

17th December 2004

7:52pm: "...It's a Disinterest, Not That I'm a Timid Guy..."
Eeeeeeek. My house is filled with fifteen year olds and music snobbery. And my mom's slag is here.

*vomits copiously*

Someone, please, I've done all my chores; get me the fuck out of here.
Current Mood: irritated

16th December 2004

10:18am: Today's the last day of school before the Christmas Holiday. Thank fucking god, I'm exhausted and fairly sick of classes at the moment.

Am currently entertaining myself with the notion of downloading a vast amount of music that doesn't suck. Thus far I've suceeded rather nicely thoughthey haven't nearly as much Holst as I'd like. Still, Air is rather soothing and older MSI makes me giddy with laughter.

Does all of that make me feel better about being stood-up this morning? Meh. And thus I spend my morning in my home-away-from-home, the OAL.

One of these days I'll lower my towering expextations, I swear.

Blargh. And other like sentiments.

Bored, which means finicky memes abound. Gacked from sillyriddles.

Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexy. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but those not show it. Dislike unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.

1. Put your birth month in an entry.
2. Strike out anything that doesn't apply to you.
3. Bold the four that best apply to you.
4. Put all twelve months under a journal cut.

MonthsCollapse )

...perhaps not?

And the album reviews at pitchfork becon me...
Current Mood: disappointed

13th December 2004

8:54am: "...When I Heard You Speak, I Felt Warm..."
Oh wow.

Wow oh wow oh wow. Morning View owns my soul.

No, I'm not talking about the Incubus album, I speak soley of it's namesake. It is, in all honesty, the coolest house I've ever had the privilage to be in. Not to mention all the bands that've recorded there, my favorites being the aforementioned, Deftones and Dredge.

Still, coolest house EVAR. We hung out with Rebekah and Jason, played some pool and walked around the grounds. The architecture is gorgeous, and it's just, I'm at a total loss for words. Though I suppose it makes sense, I should save them all for my last-minute Journal Bullshit Project and my SQRA.



Also, a side note, this Journal Project is a large, steaming pile of crap.

Thank you.
Current Mood: tired

9th December 2004

11:45pm: "...What I Was Planning, Uh- I Mean Wishing, Uh..."
Godfuckingdamnit. >.<

1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. Do you have a crush on me?
5. Would you kiss me?
6. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
7. Describe me in one word.
8. What was your first impression?
9. Do you still think that way about me now?
10. What reminds you of me?
11. If you could give me anything what would it be?
12. How well do you know me?
13. When's the last time you saw me?
14. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
15. Are you going to put this on your blog and see what I say about you?

Please, continue.

Tonight was actually remarkably fun, I laughed my ass off without care for the first time in over a week. Also, Adam looks fucking adorable in his Best Buy get-up. Worthy of a glomp squee or two if I do say so myself.

The Sibling made me a rather spiff mix, save for the surprise ending of the CD, which is the equivilant of a musical donkey punch. And yes, I do truely mean that. Hrumph.

Okay kids, it's time for some dirty soccer practice. (OH EM EFF GEE NERDY PICTURE ALERT LOLOLOLZ!!12!)Collapse )

And cut.
Current Mood: better
9:25am: "...Georgian Belles Are Gone For Weeks, Southern Belles In London Sing..."
Have decided that sincerety within my household is utter crap and am therefore refussing do thusly any longer. Also, the Woman is a manipulitave whore.


Have officially become addicted to "Wet From Birth". Listened to it for 4 hours on non-stop repeat yesterday. I need a hobby.

I've decided that perhaps things don't suck as completely and totally as once perceived. I have a good book to read, I have good music, and there's still a small handfull of people who don't suck. Also, the semester's almost over, which makes me exceedingly relieved indeed as I very much require the down-time. Yes, really, I do.

OMFG SO BOOOOORED!!!21!Collapse )


I've been thinking about this quite a lot lately and am somewhat unnerved by it; for some two months now I 've had little to no real want to write anything. ANYTHING. Not even a page or a snippet of senseless blather. It's really sort of odd, especially considering that I usually have a plethora of random little thoughts and such I feel are worthy of chronicling. And yet nothing has come out, turned up or piqued my interest in the least. I'm becoming quite frustrated with it all, actually.

Oh, the joys of being a whaokay, burnt-out High School Student.
Current Mood: sleepy

7th December 2004

10:11pm: "How Could I Forget..."
Have I mentioned yet how very much I adore my manager? Because, really, I do. Best person evar.

For the first time in a (very) long time, it appears that John Kevill has done something right within my prescence, this "right" thing being his giving me a rather excellent book to read (though it is not his personally and thus a great cause of my amusement). I'm a bit excited about it, actually. It's been a while since I've read a fantasy outside of fandom and this one seems to be quite well-written. As a result, credibility has increased, although grudgingly, as I'm a rather unforgiving whore it appears.

Still, good book.

On another note entirely, OMFG THE FAINT!!!121! Have finally managed to get Wet From Birth from Sibling and am putting all of it on computer. Am currently salivating at it like white trash in a Burger King. Quite possbily on the verge of molesting it. If it were an actual person, it'd be having my children for sure.

"I crossed my fingers but I didn't beg..."

My thoughts exactly.

None of this seems to be getting any better. Whatever. Rain works too, I suppose.

Please tell me this is a joke. I'll laugh until I cry. Honestly. Right now, even.

Introversion, how I love thee, let me count the ways...
Current Mood: indescribable
10:41am: "I'll Burn My Eyes Out Before I Get Out..."
I suppose I should be typing up my Self Analysis (which is a day late) or doing my Economics homework (also a day late) right now, but my startling lack of interest forbids me from this and thus I turn to el jay.


The Sibling's got food poisoning, which is a terrific thing indeed, I love people vomiting copiously. Read Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban to her last night and will probably resort to The Draco Trilogy by seven o'clock this evening when I find things to unslashy within cannon. After all, the sick and weary need something to cheer them up.

Goddamnit. I need to get out more.

And also, a very happy Holiday to my fabulous Jewish Friends. ^_^
Current Mood: busy

6th December 2004

12:04am: "...How Embarassed I’d Have Been If You Knew What I Was Thinking."
The themes and motifs essay for A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man makes me want to eat glass shards and die ala My Chemical-fuckingsucksOMGSTFUEMODEATH-Romance.

It's 12:15. I have to be up in 6 hours. And I have yet to actually begin the bulk of my essay.

Godfuckingdammnit. >.
Current Mood: not whaokay

5th December 2004

1:36pm: "...He Carries Them All Over The Town, At Least He Tries- Oh, Look, It's Stopped Snowing..."
Your Erotic LJ dream by cozzette
you went to bed feeling
You began to dream aboutpurelyvicious
who wasbiting you
ina hotel room
withwhipped cream everywhere
which made youhowl
but was interupted bydeniedmsi
who began toshoot video
You awokescreaming
and you hopethat dreams do come true
chance of that happening:: 79%
Quiz created with MemeGen!

Methinks there's only one way of adaquately describing this:


It's raining outside and I have work at 5 tonight. My shoes are made of canvas and I'm lacking an umbrella. Also, Blake isn't working tonight and thus no comical relief and bantering. Blaaaaaaaaaaaargh.

And I haven't even really begun work on that Joyce essay. My father's commencing to roll in his grave, on the verge of disowning me.

Wooha. Am still petty and bitter. Yet am intensely enjoying my love affair with The Faint. And Desperate Guys. Oh, that first inconceivable touch.
Current Mood: incredulous

4th December 2004

4:54pm: "And The Building Fronts Are Just Fronts..."
All right, so maybe I don't completely hate my job. Still, it's something to consider (when Blake and Carlos aren't working). At least it makes up for the total and complete waste of time yesterday ended up turning into. Ugh. How utterly wretched.

Speaking of wretched. My Chemical Romance. Blargh, and other like sentiments.

I suppose I felt the surprising urge to declare my distaste on a subject. How very intriguing.

Talked to Travis today, thank god. I'd likely go mad without him, I really truely would. I'll be ringing M-chan and Nick today or in the morrow as well. Going through my "I really miss my not-nearly-as-sucky old life" phase again. I truely do belive, though, that if I'd stayed at Dreyfoos, I'd be in a lot less shit than I am now. Dear god. And I wouldn't feel like vomiting every time I stepped into a band room with the intention of playing.

Also, this:
Your LJ Prison by redfrog021
Favorite Deadly Sin
You are convicted ofArson of a Trailer Park
And sentenced to5 years
Abusive redneck guardlllllllllllllli
Easy to bribe guardlupintursi
Wants to make you their bitchangorafirefly
Drops soap in the shower on purposecenturies_to_go
Works in the laundry and smells people's undiesgingerwolf
Comes to see you for 'conjugal visits'desiccatedberry
Quiz created with MemeGen!

I demand that all of this unsolicited, obviously non-existant bestfriend!molestation cease immidiately. As well as the smelling of panties. Travis, you dog you.

Still feeling bitter and petty. Meh. Whatever. Not entirely unexpected. Still, at least I can be slightly hopeful about the outcome at this point. Sort of. I think.

Oh Stella, I love you.

Blake and I have the coolest work banter evar. I'm so glad that a majority of the people I work with don't suck. Especially the bisexual emo transgenders' con chihuahua's *cough*BLAKE*cough*. ^_^;
Current Mood: whaokay

2nd December 2004

11:22pm: "And All The Gay Things I Say Make Such A Pretty Melody..."

Why oh WHY do I find this ever-so funny? XD
Current Mood: better/entertained

1st December 2004

11:44pm: "I'll Bring You When My Lifeboat Sails Through The Night..."

Eeee, okay, done now.

Still fuming, still "obviously" the one at fault. Apparently, as I've come to realize, the people who always tell me to stick up for myself are always shocked beyond belief when I do so to their own person. It gives me a good chuckle, because fuck, its great to be alienated. Whatever. Giving up, sweeping it under the mat and into the bottle with so many other "trivial" things.


While waiting for my ride home this evening I heard the basis of every Final Fantasy VII conversation EVAR:

Person #1: "Cloud has a big sword."
Person #2: "Sephiroth's is longer, tee hee hee!1!!"

At that point I wasn't sure whether to be frightened or not.

I'd forgotten how old one can feel sometimes. It hardly seems natural for someone my age, does it? And yet there are days when I feel I've beheld all the Ages of the World.
Current Mood: gloomy

30th November 2004

9:09pm: "She Thinks My Sentimental Side Should Be Held With Kid's Gloves..."
So I finally became utterly irate and snapped at Rebekah. Nice one, jackass. How bloody stupid am I? Honestly. You'd think that for one who does so much for you, you'd be able to tollerate at least a bit of their childish immaturity.

Meh. She taunted me, whatever.

It appears that, as of some 45 minutes ago, I've been shunned by my family for my obviously ludicrous and irrational behavior, which is nothing new, truth be told, I suppose I merely feel unresolved. It's something that will leave me once I stop thinking about it.

Everything seems to be leaving, in one sense or another. I found Sean's MySpace account and it was, by far, the greatest wave of ironic emotions I've experienced in a long while. I wish I'd never found it, yet I cannot help but be inexorably gleefull, despite the fact that it's hightly doubtful he remembers me in the least. And everyone's preoccupied and everyone's crazy and everyone's blissfully happy and I'm stuck here being thoroughly retarded, irritated to no end that everything's become far too complicated for me to be pleased with.

Oh, how simple my life would have been had I not crossed Into The West.

Fucking a. And yet I know that it's something I probably need to some extent, which infuriates me further. It all feels so heavy and over-whelming, I want nothing more than to be rid of it. I'm so burnt-out, it's awful. What completely horrid timing. It would have made sense for this to have happened last year, and now I'm out to fuck myself up irrepairably. Wooha.

I don't know what the fuck I'm complaining about. I'll wake up again tomorrow and it'll all be fine though, truth be told, I'm waiting somewhat apprehensively for a time when that fails to happen.

OMFG, be 12:30 all ready! Damnit! >.<

UntitledCollapse )

I supppose now it's time to lose myself in a light of the underwater sort.
Current Mood: disgruntled

29th November 2004

9:35pm: FYI...
I don't mean to sound like an emotionally unstable freak, but every time I listen to 'The Gray Havens' I get so misty-eyed it isn't even funny anymore. I think that thought goes for fairly all of the LOTR soundtracks.

OMFG I'm lame.

< /fandom blurb>
Current Mood: nostalgic
8:38am: "Beautiful Boys on a Beautiful Dance Floor..."
Adam, thank you for pwning, it makes me utterly giddy.

This holiday amounted to a large and rather joyful pile of nothing school work-wise. I got my SAT scores back and realized that, although my verbal scores were fine, I royally suck with math. Meaning I'll have to take them again.

Goddamnit. >.<

Maybe it's better if I just do the whole two-years-of-Moorpark-and-transfer thing. At this point I'm really starting to consider it. I mean, I'm going to be waiting until spring of 2006 until I go to school anyway. Fucking a, this whole "future" thing is really starting to get to me. If I get another "what are you doing with your life?" speech from the woman I'm going to scream. I hate not knowing what the hell I want to do with my life, and it's really not very encouraging in the least to hear a large rant about my incompetance/how one might be worried for me, etc., etc.

On another note, everything (discluding the former), for the moment, is blissfully well. The semester's coming to a close (OMGSOMUCHWORK), my family loves my boyfriend, I adore my boyfriend and I'm wearing a shirt from the Special Olympics.

Stephen Lynch, anyone? Anyone?

Work, also, seems to be doing well. They called me in to do an extra shift last night but I politely declined, citing illness (it's valid, I'm still all sniffely and stuff!) as I had Adam coming over for dinner and stuff. Once again, let me say how thrilled I am that my family actually likes this boyfriend. That's 2 out of 3, which isn't that bad, and I don't really care all that much, it just makes things so much easier.

I <3 Franz Ferdinand. Michael ownz me. And stuff. Goddamnit I'm jealous the Sibling gets to go and see them (and Interpol) next weekend. But whatever. I'll see them eventually, as I will Deftones, Weezer, LP and a million other people.

"You're waiting on a silver platter now,
Nothing matters,
Oh nothing matters,
Oh nothing matters,
Oh yeah."

< /crazed babble>
Current Mood: cheerful

27th November 2004

12:46am: "'It Helps Put The Lights Out..'"
The Thanksgiving Holiday thus far has been rather interesting indeed, so far consisting of avoiding the mall (at all costs) on Black Friday, getting Shanghai-ed by gamers to Balboa, a Goodwill outing, catching cold from Jess' dad, becoming somewhat feverish and delusional from said cold and having a rather nice Thanksgiving with a wide array of good foods and equally good company.

I am completely and utterly amazed that things have turned out as good as they have, and very thankful for it. The holiday could have died in on so many different, seperate and painful occasions it was horrifyng, yet it all seemed to work out for the better, for which I am eternally glad.

Pity my nose has decided to run away and leave the rest of my face in the preverbial dust, I rather miss it, though the dust seems to be having it's wicked way with it.

Thank god I don't have to work until 7:30pm tomorrow/tonight. Perhaps by then I'll be able to actually be coherant enough to understand basic speech/thought processes. I'm so utterly blank right now. Who knows, maybe I'll be lucky enough to have Blake and Carlos again, as I seem to enjoy their company and favor them a bit above the other staff. Goodness knows that if I'm going to be there until midnight doing inventory I deserve to be at least somewhat entertained; I barely get paid enough to sell a tee-shirt.

Also, have discovered this with my own personal tastes: football < Marvel VS. Capcom.

And I seem to have found the perfect Weasley sweater, minus the initial, of course. Now to wait for a phone call I probably shan't receive, and play more Zelda.

At this point I'm so congested I don't think I remember my own name.
Current Mood: retrospective

24th November 2004

10:29am: "We Are The Leaders Of All..."
Oh sweet jesus.

Tomorrow's Thanksgiving.

I'm having my boyfriend over, to meet my crazy psycho new-age-hippy mom.


Current Mood: deer-in-the-headlights
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